Shark Is Caught

                The search of the gigantic killer shark that has been terrorizing Amity’s shores for days now has been caught, according to the Amity Police Department. The fishermen who caught the beast will receive a $3,000 reward for their efforts.

                Marine biologist and the world’s foremost expert on sharks Matt Hooper, of the Oceanographic Institute, identified the captured shark as a nurse shark.

                “Nurse sharks are among the most brutal and dangerous of all sharks and have been responsible for hundreds of swimmers’ deaths along the East Coast of the United States,” Amity Police Chief Martin Brody announced in a press release.

                This controversy stirred up after two local youth – Chrissie Watson, 17, and Alex Kitner, 10, both of Amity, Mass. – were found dead after what many residents are blaming on a sole shark.

                These deaths prompted Amity authorities to conduct an emergency town hall meeting to discuss what should be done in light of the resident events. It was at this meeting that Police Chief Brody announced that the beaches would be closed for 24 hours so as to allow extra police presence and Coast Guard officials to arrive prior to the Fourth of July weekend.

                “24 hours, that’s like three weeks,” one townsperson proclaimed after the announcement of the beaches closure.

                With the announcement that the homicidal shark has been captured, Police Chief Brody and other Amity officials have announced that the beaches throughout Amity will reopen immediately. This news comes just in time for Fourth of July weekend, a time when tourists typically flock the island.

                Even though authorities believe the shark problem to be taken care of, Police Chief Brody said that the Amity Police Department is doing all that it can ensure that beachgoers have a safe weekend.

                “Islanders and guests alike should not be alarmed by the presence of shark spotters from the Coast Guard, the Marine Patrol, the Massachusetts State Police, the U.S. Navy, Homeland Security, the FBI and numerous local municipal and county police agencies in the waters off our beaches,” Brody said in a press release. “They are simply a safety precaution that we hope will put our visitors at ease.”

                If islanders or tourist do sight any sharks over the weekend, Police Chief Brody went on, they should report all sightings to authorities at the toll-free shark hotline, 1-800-sharksee.